Christians and sexual temptations
Posted by sharingburdens on June 27, 2007
The post Pornography: one woman looks has generated a lot of views and comments. ‘Alone’ wrote that she struggles with sexual temptations as a single woman. The Silent Killer in Our Churches at Monday Morning Insight reveals statistics about struggles with pornography among Christians, both men and women. Comments on this blog have also shifted to questions about masturbation. The purpose of this blog is to provide a safe place for talking about issues that exist but are hidden behind walls and masks. So I’ve done some reading and here’s what I’ve found to get the discussion started:
From The Woman’s Study Bible (NKJV) study notes:
- “some consider it a means of reducing excessive sexual tension when the normal sexual activity of married life is unavailable or as an alternative for promiscuity or fornication”
- “…such self-gratification may originate in lustful fantasies for selfish pleasure”
- “moral and psychological ramification can prove disruptive to a relationship with God as well as others”
Verses in The Bible (NLT):
- 1 Corinthians 6:12 You say “I am allowed to do anything”–but not everything is good for you. And even though “I am allowed to do anything,” I must not become a slave to anything
- 1 Thessalonians 4:3-7 God’s will is for you to be holy, so stay away from all sexual sin. Then each of you will control his own body and live in holiness and honor…Never harm or cheat a Christian brother in this matter by violating his wife…God has called us to live holy lives, not impure lives.
- 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body.
- Matthew 5:27-28 You have heard the commandment that says, ‘You must not commit adultery.’ But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
Pornography, chat rooms, masturbation, fantasizing…are they acceptable? Or are they violating God’s will and plan? Scripture doesn’t explicitly condone or condemn certain specific acts, but can we surmise what is meant?
One more thought: Just because we have certain normal desires, doesn’t mean we must give in to them or satisfy the desires. Temptations exist all around us.
- 1 Corinthians 10:13 The temptations in your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand.
What are your thoughts?
A Friend said
Rindy,
Thanks for the bible verses: that should really be our standard in discussing an issue like this, and the verses you present are good ones to consider.
For example, the “everything is permissable but not everything beneficial, do not be a slave to anything” is worth thinking about. I would take that to mean that while masturbation, per se, is not a sin, it CAN be if we allow it to consume us (and it can). Furthermore, while it might be permissable, it might not be the best thing. Which leads to the next thought.
We are to be in control of our bodies. If we feel like we have to masturbate because we can not control our lust then this might show a dangerous lack of discipline.
And finally, the matter of what we’re thinking about during masturbation. I doubt folks are thinking about their taxes while in the act (unless they have a VERY strange fetish). If you are fantasizing about your spouse I suppose it would be OK, but if you are thinking about that guy you work with or your friend’s wife or even Brad Pitt or Jennifer Aniston, you are lusting over that person in your mind and, according to Jesus, committing adultery with them.
I mentioned it on the other thread, but “Every Man’s Battle” is a great book that deals with this subject: their view is that masturbation is always wrong. Can’t remember the author, but you can look it up.
Hope there is some good discussion here: this might be the only forum where something like this could be talked about with confidence.
Joni said
Sex is a weird thing to navigate as a Christian woman. You are supposed to stay pure and not have lustful thoughts. Then after a 30 minute ceremony, you are supposed to flip a switch and become a sexual goddess for your husband. I suspect even more difficult the older you are when you marry. I haven’t heard any real advice in that area, at least not in the pre-marital counseling I’ve experienced(mine or someone else’s). There is biblical discussion about your body not being your own anymore. But no one talks about the transition from your body being kept to yourself into letting it go to a lover.